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Any simple theory will be worded in the most complicated way.

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Any sode theory will be worded in the most complicated way. Barr's Inertial Principle: Asking scientists to revise their theory is like asking cops to revise the law. Bassagordian's Basic Principle and Ultimate Axiom: By definition, when you are investigating the unknown, you do not know what you will find or even when you have found it. Bowie's Theorem: If an experiment works, you must be using the wrong equipment.

Campbell's Law: Nature abhors a vacuous experimenter.

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Darwin's Law: Nature will tell you a direct lie if she can. Discovery: A couple of months in the laboratory can foe save a couple of hours in the library. Eddington's Theory: The of different hypotheses erected to explain a given biological phenomenon is inversely proportional to the available knowledge. Einstein's Observation: Inasmuch as the mathematical theorems are related to reality, they are not sure; inasmuch as they are sure, they are not related to reality. Felson's Law: To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

Fett's Law of the Lab: Never replicate a successful experiment. Finagle's Creed: Science is Truth. Don't be misled by facts. If an experiment works, something has gone wrong. Once a job is fouled up, anything done to improve it only makes it worse. Wingo's Axiom: All Finagle's Laws may be bypassed by learning the simple art of doing without thinking.

To study an application best, understand it thoroughly before you start. Always keep a record of data. It indicates you've been working.

Always draw your curves, then plot the reading. In case of doubt, make it sound convincing. Program should always be reproducible. They should all fod in the same way. Do not believe in miracles. Rely on them. Finman's Law of Mathematics: Nobody wants to read anyone else's formulas. First Law of Particle Physics: The shorter the life of the particle, the more it costs to produce.

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First Law of Scientific Progress: The advance of science can be measured by the rate at which exceptions to ly held laws accumulate. Corollaries: 1. Exceptions always out rules. There are always fog to the established exceptions. By the time one masters the exceptions, no one recalls the rules to which they apply.

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soke Fourth Law of Revision: After painstaking and careful analysis of a sample, you are always told that it is the wrong sample and doesn't apply to the problem. Further Hints on Write-Ups: 1. In any collection of data, the figures that most closely confirm the theory are wrong. No one you ask for help will see the mistakes either.


Any nagging fhe who stops by with unsought advice will see them immediately. If an experiment works, you must be using the wrong equipment. An experiment may be considered successful if no more than half the data must be discarded to agree with the theory. No experiment is ever a complete failure.

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It can serve as a bad example. Always leave room, when writing a report, to add an explanation if it doesn't work Rule of the Way Out. Futility Factor: No experiment is ever a complete failure — it can always serve as a negative example. Galileo's Conclusion: Science proceeds more by what it has learned to ignore than what it takes into. Golomb's Don'ts of Mathematical Modeling: Don't believe the thirty-third-order consequences of a first-order model.

Catch Phrase: Cum grano salis. Don't extrapolate beyond the region of fit. Catch Phrase: Don't go off the deep end.

Don't apply any model until you understand the simplifying assumptions on which it is based, and can test their applicability. Catch Phrase: Use only as directed.

Don't believe that the model is the reality. Catch Phrase: Don't eat the menu. Don't fpr reality to fit the model. Catch Phrase: The 'Procrustes Method.

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Catch Phrase: Legalize polygamy. Don't retain a discredited model. Catch Phrase: Don't beat a dead horse. Don't fall in love with your model. Catch Phrase: Pygmalion. Don't apply the terminology of Subject A to the problems of Subject B if it is to the enrichment of neither. Catch Phrase: New names for old.

Don't expect that by having named a demon you have destroyed him. Catch Phrase: Rumpelstiltskin. Gordon's Law: If a research project is not worth doing at all, it is not worth doing well. Grelb's Law of Erroring: In any series of calculations, errors tend to occur at the opposite end from which you begin checking.

Gross's Postulate: Facts are not all equal. There are good facts and bad facts.

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Science consists of using good facts. Handy Guide to Modern Science: 1. If it's green or it wriggles, it's biology. If it stinks, it's chemistry. If it doesn't work, it's physics. If it's incomprehensible, it's mathematics.

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If it doesn't make sense, it's either economics or psychology. Hanggi's Law: The more trivial your research, ghing more people will read it and agree. Corollary: The more vital your research, the less people will understand it. Henderson's Law of Scholarship: Research is reading two books that have never been read to write a third that will never be read.

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Hersh's Law: Biochemistry expands to fill the space and time available for its completion and publication. If in any problem you find yourself doing an immense amount of work, the answer can be obtained by simple inspection.

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If mathematically you end up with the wrong answer, try multiplying by the. In an instrument or device characterized by a of plus-or-minus errors, the total error will be the sum of all the errors adding in the same direction. Thinv any given calculation, the fault will never be placed if more than one person is involved. Corollary: In any given discovery, the credit will never be properly placed hting more than one person is involved.

Jaffe's Precept: There are some things that are impossible to know — but it is impossible to know these el monte transgender escorts. Law Of Continuity: Experiments should be reproducible. Law of Invisible Phenomena: The absence of evidence is not evidence of absence. Law of Laboratory Work: Hot glass looks exactly the same as cold glass.

Logic is a systematic method of reaching the wrong conclusion with confidence. Long's Truism: Natural laws have no pity. Maier's Law: If the facts do not conform to the theory, they must be disposed of. The bigger the somd, the better. Somw experiment may be considered serbia sex chat success of no more than 50 hte of the observed measurements must be discarded to obtain a correspondence with the theory.

Mann's Law generalized : If a scientists uncovers a publishable fact, it will become central to his theory. Corollary: His theory, in turn, will become central to all scientific thought. May's Law hhe Stratigraphy: The quality of correlation is inversely proportional to the density of control. Morton's Law: If rats are experimented upon, they will develop cancer. Muench's Law: Nothing improves an innovation like lack of controls. Murphy's Law of Research: Enough research will tend to support you theory.

Murphy's Metric Recommendation: We should go metric every inch of the way.